time marches on…

Its a Saturday morning and I’m sitting here with my cup of coffee and Scott is working on the electrical. He’s puttering around fixing this and that and I think I love him The dogs are playing with bones and chasing each other around the house. Connor is down for a nap and there is peace.

So I’m sitting here at my computer and I throw some music on – In my stack is an old Chris Tomlin CD (Arriving) and I think “Wow I havent heard that in a while… I’ll listen to that” And just like that I’m back in the old building at First Christian in the chapel listening to Derek sing these songs for Tuesdays. I remember Adam as a grump (but not really) and Julie bringing whatever was for dinner that night.

I remember feeling so apart and at the same time so a part. I wish now that I’d gone out after the service was over, I wish that I’d met people and had a good time. I wish I’d seen how many people reached out to me. But at the same time I dont want to change a thing. Isnt it funny how a time can just rush back at you? I can see the lights and smell the room, and taste the Dr. Pepper I’m sure I was drinking at the time. I can remember exactly how it felt to walk through the sanctuary to my car. I can feel how cold it was outside and what the upholstery of my car felt like as I sat down to drive away.

Then like waking up I realize I will have the same feelings years from now about the moment I’m in right now. I’ll remember the sound of Tomlin on the stereo, the smell of my coffee, I’ll remember exactly what was on the table around me. I’ll see the toys on the floor, and hear the dogs barking and feel the affection I feel right now for Scott as he hums along with electrical wire in this hands. This is how it feels to know a moment. When God says he knows us this is what he’s talking about.